MONOGAMY VS POLYGAMY

A reasoning from I-sis Marydread

Some people think that it is alright for a man to have more than one wife according to tradition in Africa and also in the Scriptures. This question always causes much debate when it comes up in real life or in cyberspace. Here I give my own reasoning concerning this.

First and most important in I&I livity is the duty to follow the Isample of His Imperial Majesty Haile Selassie I and His wife the Empress Menen. His Imperial Majesty married only one wife and remained faithful to her. After the Empress passed he did not take another wife, so great was the love they shared. This is the ideal marriage as detailed in Genesis 1:24

"Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh."

Of course this ideal is seldom reached and in these times it seems that it is getting harder and harder. Even Empress Menen was married before and had children from this previous relationship. (see Empress Menen biography) Still the ideal holds: one man should be with one woman at one time. 

Even in the sacred marriage of Abraham and Sarah, a child was born to Abraham and Hagar, Sarah's handmaid. The repercussions of that are still felt to this day in the hostilities between the children of Ishmael (Hagar's son) and the children of Isaac (Sarah's son) and their followers and allies. The current examples being the "War on Terrorism" and the "War in Israel".

In Genesis 30 we see that even sisters can fall out because of jealousy when married to the same husband.

For more Biblical examples Noah who was the only man righteous on the whole Earth and his three sons had only one wife each. Even though it would have made sense to take more women to replenish the Earth after the flood each man only took his one wife.

Genesis 7: 13 " In the selfsame day entered Noah, and Shem, and Ham, and Japheth, the sons of Noah, and Noah's wife, and the three wives of his sons with them, into the ark;"

Some people quote King Solomon as an example as Solomon had 700 wives. Still this was not condoned by the Most High, this behaviour led to the fragmentation of Israel, leaving only one tribe from the original twelve under the rule of the House of David. The major part of the glory of Israel departed at this time to Ethiopia where JAH set up a new dynasty with a new David, through Solomon's son with Makeda the Queen of Sheba, who was named Menelik I or David II. This is recounted in the Kebra Negast which also tells of Menelik's visit to his father and his return to Ethiopia bearing the Ark of the Covenant and accompanied by the first born sons of the elders of Israel.

Staying with the Bible :

The laws for Kings : Deuteronomy 17:17 "Neither shall he multiply wives to himself, that his heart turn not away: neither shall he greatly multiply to himself silver and gold."

In the New Testament polygamy is not allowed, the ideal being celibacy as practiced by the highest orders of the Essene community, still if one had to marry, then one husband, one wife is stressed especially for the church elders

1 Timothy 3: 2: "A bishop then must be blameless, the husband of one wife, vigilant, sober, of good behaviour, given to hospitality, apt to teach;"

& verse 12 "Let the deacons be the husbands of one wife, ruling their children and their own houses well."

and in Titus 1 verse 6 "If any be blameless, the husband of one wife, having faithful children not accused of riot or unruly."

Many stress that it is trodition in Africa for a man to have more than one wife. I would say in Africa when a man has more than one wife, he must be able to support them all, and all the children, and keep them happy. There is no welfare benefits there. If the wives are not kept happy then he could end up supporting the children of other men without knowing it!!! If one asked the women in question what they thought of this relationship, then in most cases I believe, (based on I personal feelings as a woman and from various documentaries I have seen) that they would rather have their husband to themselves. It is only when the woman really doesn't like the man anymore that she is relieved to share him with someone else.

Furthermore Africa is a huge continent and traditions vary from region to region. In Ethiopia, InI Father's home, there is a very strict livity concerning marriage.

Also just because something is traditional does not make it right. Some traditions need challenging and rethinking in these times. For example, female circumcision is not right (IMHO) and slavery is not right. Both these traditions are still practiced in many parts of the world. Read the book Slave by Mende Nazar who has experienced both in the Sudan and only managed to escape from slavery when sent to London by her "owner".
Visit the Anti Slavery site for up to date information about slavery worldwide.

Raspect.